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 alright... well just to give you guys a quick story... a few years ago i never seen myself as being the military type.... but in the begining of December i have really begun to look into the career.... i was thinking of going in as an MP, for the obvious reason that i want to become a cop when my service is over.... im 17 years old turning 18 June 4th....btw ... but i deal with my mother and father who have a bad drug addiction to heroine... they have had this addiction for about 18 years now... years passed and their addiction started to become a normal for me... i always knew that what they were doing was obviously bad, but i had been around it for so long it just never really phased me... when i was about 8 years old my parents had finacial problems and had got evicted out of their apartment and we had lived in a car for about a little over a year.... a family member of mine had taken us into her home and we have been living there ever since.... and they still continued the addiction... i have been through a long process of trying to find myself and where i wanted my future to end up... so now this is my problem... the family member that we are currently staying with has pretty much had enough of my parents late delays on rent and the excessive amount of bill collecting phone calls that occur constantly...not including everything but you get the idea...  so she is deciding to move out and put money down on a house... basically leaving my parents to go about their own and where they end up is on them... considering that they cannot support themselves finacially, but is still allowing me to come stay with her since 18 is legal and i can make my own choices....  so now.... im placed between feeling the obligation to stick with my parents and try to help them... which my father had basically said that i have to stay and help them out by getting a full time job... not to mention i havn't even graduated high school yet... graduation day is June 5th for my Senior class....but the military is my passion for now and i really want to get myself enlisted and on my way to starting a successful career.... i know that by staying with my parents that i am going to be put in a position where i will not know anything of the future... MY FUTURE FOR THAT MATTER! but if i chose to go the other way and leave my parents behind i have to deal with an aunt who absolutely hates the idea of enlisting myself into the military field... and i will have to feel as though i am turning my back on my parents... which in a sense i am... im really confused about this whole thing and figured i would ask for some advice to my situation... i know that i need to do what is best for me and my future but it kills me to think about every little aspect of this.... makes me sick actually... it be great if i got some help... thanks guys...

While I feel for you and your confusion in this predicament, I think that unless you make a move (a big one, and soon) you may end up going down the same path as your Parents.  It appears that they are quite comfortable with their addictive lifestyle and expect you to work to pay the house bills while they continue to squander their money on drugs. Doesn't sound like a very attractive lifestyle for a bright and ambitious young person. Unfortunately we are never able to choose our family members and sometimes we must understand that the lifestyles that some of them choose are not the ones that we, ourselves, want to live.  They will often threaten to disown you or try to get your sympathy, but you must think it through. Do you want to spend the rest of your life working just to support their drug lifestyle, or to appease your Aunt?  Your future is YOURS and as such it is yours to decide upon.

You sound like a responsible, intelligent person.  While the decision may be hard to make, it must be made, for the sake of your future.  If you truly want to become a LEO then the military would be a very good place to get four years of training and education (college while in the Service).  While your Aunt may not like the idea of  you going into the Service, that is a decision that is yours to make, not hers.  Remember, by enlisting you will be going away from both your Parents and your Aunts environment for abot 4 years, so you will not have to worry about room & board, food, etc..  Research all branches of the Military Service before making your choice.  Each branch has a "Military Police" section that serves basically the same Law Enforcement function, and each would be a great stepping stone to a future Law Enforcement career. You would come out of the military a much stronger (physically and mentally), self-sufficient and employable individual.

Good Luck, you have some tough choices to make, I hope that all works out well for you.

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At eighteen, it is time to focus all energy on your future, and don't worry about enabling your parents to further use everyone and everything around them, if they have been using for as long as you say they have, there is nothing at this point you can do for them but keep them supplied with room, board, food and drugs. You already know what path you want to walk, so get to stepping that way and don't misstep.

Ahoward, you need to get away from your parents! I know that is probably going to be hard to do, but you have two choices: stay with them and let them drag you down, or move on and make a better life for your self. The military is a great way to do just that. My military career was short lived because of injury but I do not regret joining one bit.

First of all, I'm sorry that you have to go through all of this. From reading your posts, it sounds as if you are a strong individual. You're right, no one should have to put up with what you have gone through, let alone a (17) year old. I can understand your concern that you need to help your parents, but the fact of the matter is that they are adults, and are capable of seeking that help on their own. Their brand of "help" that they want is for you to help enable their behavior. This is what addictive personalities do. I may be repeating what has been said in other posts, but I strongly encourage you to get out of that situation. The military is a good option as it provides training, benefits for school, a steady income, and best of all, a structured environment. I would echo the advice, that you should get into some type of counseling right away. You have carried a heavy burden for what sounds like a long time, so talking with someone would be helpful. You need to focus on yourself and make the decisions that are best for you. Like I said, you sound like you are a strong person, and I am positive that you will be okay. I wish you the best of luck.

This situation is not the best by any way, but it sounds like you know what you want to do with your life, and it sounds like you have already made that choice. As for joining the service there is no more honorable way of service than that. No matter what branch (ARMY) you chose you are looking in the right direction for you and where you want to go, wish you the best of luck with it. 

Just remember only look forward, because something might be gaining on you.

Ashley, consider the fact that while you love your parents and want to help them, by standing by them you may just be enabling their own self-destruction.  They might be better off if they had to step up to the plate and answer for their own actions.  And it sure looks like you need to get away from the situation before something happens that can create a problem for you in pursuing your dream to be an LEO.  You might actually be showing more love for them by letting them deal with their own choices.  Parents are often taught to practice "tough love" with their kids when the kids don't want to be responsible for themselves.  Perhaps it is time to love your parents with some "tough love."   It may be really hard to do, but it will probably be the best for them and for your future.

Ashely, you must get yourself away from this situation.  For your own sake of course but also for your parents.  By helping them continue their addiction you are not helping them.  As everyone is saying here you going into the military (and soon) is the best answer.  My mother is a stranger and my dad is a drunk.  I was almost dragged down the same path until several members of the local VFW pulled me out.  They talked me into going to the airforce.  It turns out I was unable to join the military becuase of a health issue.  (And it is my only true regret. )  But just in the act of leaving for a short time I gained the curage I needed to go on to college and get out of my bad situation.   Good luck and please heed the advice of all those who are giving you wisdom here.  These people know what they are talking about.  Sad stories of addiction are a part of our everyday life as LEOs.

Ashley ;

I come from a broken home background relating to alcohol. I grew up in the local pool rooms and new all the book makers, numbers runners, arm twisters , leg breakers, the lowest of the low. I did not let that stand in the way of my conscience and common sense . I did not want to be looking over my shoulder all the time to see if the cops were coming for me like the previously listed "friends". The home life for me was ridiculous. I was 18 and owned a brand new Corvette because I worked and went to school at the same time. Then I was drafted into the army . For the most part I was already a responsible person , much like yourself , I was surviving on my own instincts. When I entered the military , I can actually say that you cant buy that education any place else. You will learn teamwork, pride in self , learn about different ways of life from your fellow soldiers, and most of all , how to take an order when you don't want to or think about questioning it. Once you learn how to take the order , then you have an understanding when you have to give an order. You have obviously taken care of your self for quite some time now, and done a very good job by staying in school. Now it is your turn to think , what is more important to me? Mother and Father  who have used you for passing drug testing , or your future and the rest of your life? You should not feel responsible for them at this point, they will find someone else to lean on. You should not feel any guilt by joining the service for the betterment of you life. Everyone who has posted here is generally in agreement as to your situation. I would also suggest the counseling rout also. Remember you don't have to take anyone's advice that you don't feel comfortable with. Most everyone on this forum are either now serving as Police officers or like myself and several others, retired and also for the most part parents themselves and would not give any bad information. Remember Police Officers are representatives to render assistance to those in need. God speed and good luck with what ever you chose to do.